AURORA, Illinois – Dr. Arnold Schneider was stripped of his medical license after misdiagnosing lung cancer as a case of the Mondays.
When long time patient Darlene Hammond went to Dr. Schneider complaining of tightness in her chest, shortness of breath, and repeated bouts of bronchitis, Dr. Schneider chuckled and told her to “quit her belly aching,” she was in good health, but merely coming down with a case of the Mondays. Ms. Hammond insisted she believed her smoking 2-packs a day was a factor and even requested further tests. Dr. Schneider got defensive, “I’m sorry, who has two thumbs and is a doctor? Arnold Schneider, that’s who. Trust me, you have Mondays written all over you.”
When Ms. Hammond pointed out the fact that it was actually Wednesday, Dr. Schneider shook his head in disbelief. “Ms. Hammond, do you need to be Lou Gehrig to get Lou Gehrig’s disease? Do you need to be BFFs with James Parkinson to diagnose Parkinson’s disease? Do you need vacation with Hans Asperger in the Hamptons to be knowledgeable on Asperger Syndrome? No. You can get a case of the Mondays on any given day, especially Wednesdays.”
Darlene Hammond was shocked when Dr. Schneider recommended she get crunk in order to treat her severe case of Mondays. She immediately stormed out of his office insisting this wasn’t over, and in her fury, even began to believe that perhaps she was indeed coming down with the Mondays and later called the doctor’s office to apologize.
Weeks later, when she the symptoms persisted, she sought a second opinion. After being diagnosed with lung cancer she immediate filed a complaint against Dr. Schneider.
When a jury of his peers unanimously decided Dr. Schneider would not be able to practice medicine anymore, Arnold Schneider stood up, pointed to the judge and jury, and immediately diagnosed all of them with a case of the Mondays too.
143 ex-patients of Dr. Schneider have since come forward citing similar allegations.